quinta-feira, outubro 06, 2005

Escutas do Núcleo: Serviço público ao Ernesto

O coitado do Ernesto foi ver o 50 Cent a julgar que ia ver...


...isto...





...e afinal saiu-lhe...

...disto.






















Ernesto, homem de família, ficou tão chocado que apanhou um grupo de criancinhas à porta do Pavilhão Atlântico para lhes explicar os malefícios "das bujardas que este delinquente sem graça vociferou". A câmara oculta do Núcleo captou esse momento:






Pobre Ernesto, que saiu defraudado pelo meliante. Em serviço público ao Ernesto e a todos os leitores incautos, eis um especial Escutas do Núcleo: escutámos os discos do 50 Cent e transcrevemos as partes relevantes:

You can call me player yeah, but I ain't playing fair (Uh huh)
Takers say I'm the hottest thang comin' this year (No doubt, ha ha ha)
In the hood niggas know, how I handle my problems
I walk up close, and I fo', fo' revolve 'em
Don't make me run to you, put the gun to you
Have yo ass on Phil Donahue explaining what the fuck I done to you
Thug niggas in the street saying I'm sunning you
Dude I'll smoke you every motherfucker under you
People say chill, but still I do, what I wanna do
For now on, when I speak, y'all niggas better listen
Why run against a thoroughbred when you ain't in no condition
Still got shit on ya nose, from all that ass you been kissing


Niggas screw they face up at me
On some real shit son, they don't want beef
I cock that, aim that shit out the window
Spray, there ain't a shell that bend my heat
Ya'll niggas better lay down, yeah I mean stay down
Get hit with a K round, ya ass ain't gon' make it
You niggas gon' get layed out in blood and ya brains out
Have you on the concrete, shiverin' and shakin'
I'm from Southside mothafucka, where the gats explode
If you feel like you on fire, boy drop and roll
niggas'll heat ya ass up cause they heart turns cold
Now you can be a victim or you can lock and load
The party jump, with shorty bouncin' that ass
I won't fuck, gimme a second, I'ma holla, I'ma see whats up
I got my razor in my hand, got my pistol in my trunk
Carve ya ass up nice, you play me like a punk


As your heart starts to race cause a robbery could turn into a homo-case
Co-opperate or Doc will have to op-porate, niggas will pop at you
Run the light, then pop at Jake, trust me son, niggas will go hard for that cake
These thirsty niggas will lurk, then you'll have to catch 'em and murk 'em


Lil' mama show me how you move it,
Better Yet put ya back into it,
Do ya thang like there aint nothin to it,
Shake..shake.. shake that ass girl.


Go, Go, Go, 50 in the house - bounce, y'all already know what I'm about.
The flow sounds sicker over Dre' drums nigga,
I ain't stupid - I see Doc and my dope come quicker.
Whoa!
Shorty' hips is hypnotic, she moves is so erotic, but watch - I'm like bounce that assss girl.
I get it crunk in here, I make it jump in here, front in here, we'll thump in here.
Oooohh.
I'm so gutter, so ghetto, so hood.
So gully, so grimey, what's good?
Outside, the Benz on dubs -
I'm in the club wit the snubs - don't start nothin', it won't be nothin'.



PS1: Ernesto: a Procuradoria Geral da República ligou e disse que tu és um cota conservador, censor, e, quem sabe até, racista. E diz que não te dá o dinheiro de volta.

PS2: Vostra : Já estás avisado porra, esta paneleirice de posts antigos arrumados à esquerda e em letrinha pequena não tá com nada. Mexe esse culo e trata de pôr isto com um aspecto decente, a menos que queiras sofrer as consequências.